There will be no province-wide social media gender-reveal party for Brian Jean's and Kimberly Michelutti's expected baby.
True, this would have given all Albertans the opportunity to continue to take part in the fascinating Jean Family story. But not having a baby-gender-reveal party avoids the risk and disappointment associated with setting off pink or blue smoke bombs to inform folks of the expected infant's sex.
When that happened last November in Arizona, it sparked a wildfire that cost US$8 million to put out.
Jean, former leader of Alberta's Wildrose Party, certainly wouldn't want to face the fate of Dennis Dickey, the proud Arizona daddy-to-be whose blue-hued explosion resulted in a $100,000 fine and a reluctant agreement to pay $500 a month for the next 20 years as restitution for the cost of fighting the blaze.
Mind you, the risk of anything like that happening in Alberta political circles is extremely small as we have obviously taken to heart the advice of the late U.S. President John F. Kennedy, who famously explained the best way to make smoke for political purposes: "Where there's smoke, there is usually a smoke-making machine."
The old Wildrose Party smoke-making machine was certainly working overtime for the past couple of weeks on the topic of Jean's and Michelutti's impending announcement, and expectant journalists and political watchers with fertile imaginations tuned in for their performance yesterday afternoon on the Facebook Live video streaming service in the hope the event was pregnant with possibility.
After some technical difficulties figuring out how Facebook Live works, the expectant couple announced their anticipated baby will be a girl, confirming one of the worst-kept secrets in Alberta. All Albertans wish the couple the best and continued success as they go forth and multiply.
Star Metro's Alberta editions may have overstated things a bit, though, when they reported that Jean got "the last laugh" with his prank. To see if that is true, we will need to wait until the next time he tries to call a news conference.
Meanwhile, in other news, a much-anticipated announcement south of the Medicine Line also failed to live up to expectations.
President Donald Trump had been expected to declare a national emergency so he could procure funds to build his wall along the Mexican border, seeing as Mexico won't pay for it. Instead, the president just offered his usual misinformation and malice, to borrow a felicitous phrase from House Speaker Nancy Pelosi.
David Climenhaga, author of the Alberta Diary blog, is a journalist, author, journalism teacher, poet and trade union communicator who has worked in senior writing and editing positions with the Toronto Globe and Mail and the Calgary Herald. This post also appears on David Climenhaga's blog, AlbertaPolitics.ca.
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